Friday 20 May 2011

Panic.

I am 118. HOW. How is this even possible? I was 114 yesterday and all I had to eat was leek and fennel soup. I'm not nearing my period, there is no logical explanation. How the fuck is this happening right now? What did I do wrong? Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh.

I've already done a salt water flush as an emergency measure because I'm seriously freaking out. I don't understand what happened here. I want to crawl into a hole. I'm not eating today or tomorrow. Not a fucking bite. How can I think of eating when 4 random pounds just jumped back on? Ugh I'm such a huge fat cow.

I've already done my run for the day, time for an arm workout. Then an ab workout and some squats and who knows what else I can squeeze in. This can't be happening. All my hard work.

What could be causing this? Can you just bloat randomly? I did take two advil yesterday and I remember someone telling me that can bloat me.... Maybe that's what's happening? This can't be real. This can't be permanent.

Please, please, please go away. Go away and I'll be so good about fasting. I'll restrict like a champion. I'll do anything just please make these 4 lbs go away.

1 comment:

  1. Dear, you're not a huge fat cow! I promise you! It's probably the salt from the soup and the salt water flush that's making your retain water. There's no way you could gain 4 "real" pounds overnight unles you had around 14,000 calories!

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